tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
