Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
