oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
