The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize