they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Randomize