Dual....:-)
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
