So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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