I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
