Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
