tell your sister to shave her snatch
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize
