I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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