Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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