stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize