I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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