I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
