So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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