Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I wish i was in the wii world.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
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