He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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