You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
