Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
