man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I am midnight drunk by noon
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
