The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
