You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize
