So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
