im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
