I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
