I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Be still, my beating vagina.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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