We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Randomize
