if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
