I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize
