That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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