his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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