It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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