we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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