the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
