My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
