hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I am one with the molecules
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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