Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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