But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
