Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
