So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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