You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
