We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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