it hurts more in the daytime
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
a search helicopter?!
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
