So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
