I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
