So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
