They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
I'm really busy with my period
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
