this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
