He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
