I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
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